One of my favorite parts (as well as the most difficult) of my trip to Panama was our time in Santa Marta. Though the language barrier loomed large at the beginning of the trip, through patience and laughter Audra, Courtney and I were able to communicate effectively with our host family. For me the most meaningful night we spent with them was when Marcelina (Chelita) played her guitar and sang a few worship songs she had written for their church. It was incredibly moving for me personally to see God worshipped with the same depth I see in my church family here at home. The truly catholic nature of the Christian church began to sink in for me last year when I visited Jerusalem and hearing Chelita singing praises to God with us strengthened that observation.
Chelita wrote down the songs she sang for us as a memento of the time we spent with their family. I would like to share them with you.
El Propósito de Dios
Alguna vez te has preguntado
Cual es el proposito de Dios, para tu vida
Alguna vez te has preguntado
En tus dificultades, quien te dá la salida
Cuando miras la naturaleza
Sabes que no pudo hacerse al azar
Cuando observas las estrellas
Piensas que salas no pueden alumbrar
Dios ha pensado en tí, antes de la creación del mundo
Dios siempre te ha amado, con amor profundo
Dios ha estado contigo, en todos los momentos de la vida
Y en las problemas te da la salida
Todo lo que Dios ha creado
Es para que lo puedas disfrutar
Y los nando mientas que ha dado
Es para que puedas tu vida guiar
Su propósito ha sido, es y siempre será
Que gozemos de la vida
Más allí, en la eternidad
(The other to come soon.)
Showing posts with label Panama. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Panama. Show all posts
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Panama: Day 1
Well Friends,
It is time to start my day by day blogging about Panama. This will probably go the way of my Israel blog posts and only be updated about once a month or so. But I will at least get started.
Day Zero: February 15
After a fun-filled weekend watching my sister play basketball during the St. Charles tournament, I returned home and packed for Panama. I was not able to fit all of my things into one bag, so I had to search the house for a good sized duffle bag. I found one and soon after had my bags packed a ready to go.
The evening of February 15, I began my travels by boarding a train bound for Kirkwood, MO. It was quite fun trying to deal with a hiking backpack, a large duffle bag, and a small personal bag filled with everything I needed for two months in Panama. Fortunately, there were not too many people on the train so I was able to put my backpack in the seat next to me instead of in the overhead compartment. I wouldn’t have been able to lift it high enough to put it there anyway…
I arrived at Kirkwood on time, surprisingly. My grandmother was there to meet me, and we drove to her house. Since she had to get to me to the airport by 4 a.m. the next day, we did not stay up too late.
I awoke not-so-bright-but-very-early the next day. We drove to the airport. I was freezing since I was dressed for the tropics where it is not as cold as it is in Mid-February Missouri. When we got to the airport, Grandma walked me to the American Airlines check in point. Since it was early, she left as soon as I saw someone I knew waiting in line.
The check-in line didn’t open until 4:30 so I spent about 15 minutes waiting for it to open up. Once it did, I got my tickets and headed for the security lines. I was feeling pretty confident since it had been less than a year since I had traveled internationally, so I actually remember what I was supposed to do. A few of the people who had never flown before were uncertain about what they were allowed to bring in their carry-on luggage, but eventually they got every thing figured out and we boarded the plane.
We flew to either the Atlanta or Miami Airport (I don’t remember which…). It was a pretty short layover. The only exciting thing was that we lost Ethan for a little while, and we were a little concerned that he might miss the plane. We managed to find him, though, and everyone in our group made it onto the plane.
We landed in Panama City. That was pretty exciting. Getting through the airport was easy. We met up with the people from KC. They had arrived the day before. Julie gave us sandwiches. We got on a bus. We drove to La MICA. Then the real fun began.
The sun was beginning to set when we arrived so they wanted us to hurry getting to the station so we would not have to walk the trail in the dark. (A darn fine thing I didn’t have to walk in the dark that day. I probably would have gone home.) We started walking, and since this was my first introduction to the trail, plus I wasn’t in super good shape, plus I was dehydrated, plus I kept thinking about the fact that I was going to have to walk this trail if I wanted to go anywhere, I wasn’t particularly happy. To be completely accurate, I was a little freaked out. I was proud that I didn’t have a panic attack, but I was very close.
Things didn’t get much better once we got to the station. We had dinner, chose our beds, put up our mosquito nets, and then we had to turn the generator off because they were short on gasoline due to Carnival. So it was 9 p.m., and I was stuck in the middle of the tropical dry forest in the dark.
I could go into more detail, but I really don’t like thinking about it. I wasn’t really having a good time. Fortunately that changed, and I did enjoy my time in Panama.
It is time to start my day by day blogging about Panama. This will probably go the way of my Israel blog posts and only be updated about once a month or so. But I will at least get started.
Day Zero: February 15
After a fun-filled weekend watching my sister play basketball during the St. Charles tournament, I returned home and packed for Panama. I was not able to fit all of my things into one bag, so I had to search the house for a good sized duffle bag. I found one and soon after had my bags packed a ready to go.
The evening of February 15, I began my travels by boarding a train bound for Kirkwood, MO. It was quite fun trying to deal with a hiking backpack, a large duffle bag, and a small personal bag filled with everything I needed for two months in Panama. Fortunately, there were not too many people on the train so I was able to put my backpack in the seat next to me instead of in the overhead compartment. I wouldn’t have been able to lift it high enough to put it there anyway…
I arrived at Kirkwood on time, surprisingly. My grandmother was there to meet me, and we drove to her house. Since she had to get to me to the airport by 4 a.m. the next day, we did not stay up too late.
I awoke not-so-bright-but-very-early the next day. We drove to the airport. I was freezing since I was dressed for the tropics where it is not as cold as it is in Mid-February Missouri. When we got to the airport, Grandma walked me to the American Airlines check in point. Since it was early, she left as soon as I saw someone I knew waiting in line.
The check-in line didn’t open until 4:30 so I spent about 15 minutes waiting for it to open up. Once it did, I got my tickets and headed for the security lines. I was feeling pretty confident since it had been less than a year since I had traveled internationally, so I actually remember what I was supposed to do. A few of the people who had never flown before were uncertain about what they were allowed to bring in their carry-on luggage, but eventually they got every thing figured out and we boarded the plane.
We flew to either the Atlanta or Miami Airport (I don’t remember which…). It was a pretty short layover. The only exciting thing was that we lost Ethan for a little while, and we were a little concerned that he might miss the plane. We managed to find him, though, and everyone in our group made it onto the plane.
We landed in Panama City. That was pretty exciting. Getting through the airport was easy. We met up with the people from KC. They had arrived the day before. Julie gave us sandwiches. We got on a bus. We drove to La MICA. Then the real fun began.
The sun was beginning to set when we arrived so they wanted us to hurry getting to the station so we would not have to walk the trail in the dark. (A darn fine thing I didn’t have to walk in the dark that day. I probably would have gone home.) We started walking, and since this was my first introduction to the trail, plus I wasn’t in super good shape, plus I was dehydrated, plus I kept thinking about the fact that I was going to have to walk this trail if I wanted to go anywhere, I wasn’t particularly happy. To be completely accurate, I was a little freaked out. I was proud that I didn’t have a panic attack, but I was very close.
Things didn’t get much better once we got to the station. We had dinner, chose our beds, put up our mosquito nets, and then we had to turn the generator off because they were short on gasoline due to Carnival. So it was 9 p.m., and I was stuck in the middle of the tropical dry forest in the dark.
I could go into more detail, but I really don’t like thinking about it. I wasn’t really having a good time. Fortunately that changed, and I did enjoy my time in Panama.
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Presentation Days
Our class has been finishing up our projects by presenting our research during yesterday and today. It has been really awesome hearing what everyone has done (even though we lived these projects for two months).
Good Job Everyone!
Good Job Everyone!
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Thursday, April 22, 2010
My last day of class.
I attended my last day of class as an undergraduate today. It did not feel as monumental as I was expecting. Perhaps that is because instead of sharing this feeling with a large group of others, I only have 2 other people in the same situation. Well, in a week and a day more of my friends shall join me in the "We're done with undergrad classes!" category.
In other news, I am looking forward to reading everyone's submissions for our JINS book. Also, I am applying for an internship in Montana. It doesn't pay, so I don't know if it will work out for me. But we'll see, I guess. No harm in applying.
In other news, I am looking forward to reading everyone's submissions for our JINS book. Also, I am applying for an internship in Montana. It doesn't pay, so I don't know if it will work out for me. But we'll see, I guess. No harm in applying.
Friday, April 16, 2010
So since I have returned from Panama I realize that I have lost or forgotten the location of many of the things I used everyday prior to my trip. Every once in a while I will stumble upon them as I am going through things in my room. Because of this, it does not usually bother me too much if I can't find something. I know it will eventually show up. There is one situation, however, where this did not hold true.
When I returned to the States, it was the beginning of spring time. The birds were singing, the sun was shining, the trees and flowers were budding and the pollen was flying. This created a need to break out the Kleenex/Puffs/Generic Store Brand Tissues. When I was finished blowing my nose, I looked over in the corner of my room to see that my trash can was missing. This confused me greatly because I knew I could not have misplaced it. It never gets moved; I just take the bag out and then reline the can rather than taking the entire can out to the dumpster. I was quite perturbed because I had no idea what could have happened to it. I didn't think anyone would have taken it since everyone has their own trashcans, and there was no way I could have misplaced it.
I was determined to solve the mystery so I ask the members of my household if they knew the whereabouts of my trashcan. I discovered that a to-remain-nameless individual had stolen my trashcan and was using it in the basement. My sister ran downstairs and brought it to the family room. "I found your trashcan," she told me triumphantly, right before she dropped it on the floor and broke it.
So now I have no trashcan.
When I returned to the States, it was the beginning of spring time. The birds were singing, the sun was shining, the trees and flowers were budding and the pollen was flying. This created a need to break out the Kleenex/Puffs/Generic Store Brand Tissues. When I was finished blowing my nose, I looked over in the corner of my room to see that my trash can was missing. This confused me greatly because I knew I could not have misplaced it. It never gets moved; I just take the bag out and then reline the can rather than taking the entire can out to the dumpster. I was quite perturbed because I had no idea what could have happened to it. I didn't think anyone would have taken it since everyone has their own trashcans, and there was no way I could have misplaced it.
I was determined to solve the mystery so I ask the members of my household if they knew the whereabouts of my trashcan. I discovered that a to-remain-nameless individual had stolen my trashcan and was using it in the basement. My sister ran downstairs and brought it to the family room. "I found your trashcan," she told me triumphantly, right before she dropped it on the floor and broke it.
So now I have no trashcan.
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
I saved the life of an Ant today.
A brief story to demonstrate how going to Panama changed my life.
This evening I was sitting in my living room with my housemates when one of them saw an insect running on the floor. She exclaimed, "There's a bug on the floor! There's a bug on the floor!" I said, "It's okay" and moved from my chair to look at it more closely. She said, "Kill it! Kill it!" I replied, "It's an Ant!" She said, "Kill it!" I said, "How about I pick it up and take it outside."
Then I let it crawl on my hand, and I took it outside and set it free.
This evening I was sitting in my living room with my housemates when one of them saw an insect running on the floor. She exclaimed, "There's a bug on the floor! There's a bug on the floor!" I said, "It's okay" and moved from my chair to look at it more closely. She said, "Kill it! Kill it!" I replied, "It's an Ant!" She said, "Kill it!" I said, "How about I pick it up and take it outside."
Then I let it crawl on my hand, and I took it outside and set it free.
Saturday, April 10, 2010
Books I read while I was gone
After glancing through my previous blog posts, I noticed the list I made of books I took with me to Panama. Here is the list of books I read while I was gone.
Pride and Prejudice and Zombies
Dune
½ of Ivanhoe
Paradise Lost
The Beak of the Finch
The Never Ending Story
Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief
Rebecca
The Cave
Siddhartha
Prey
Pride and Prejudice and Zombies
Dune
½ of Ivanhoe
Paradise Lost
The Beak of the Finch
The Never Ending Story
Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief
Rebecca
The Cave
Siddhartha
Prey
Saturday, March 13, 2010
Fear is the mind-killer...
"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain."
- Dune by Frank Herbert.
This quote has popped into my head many, many times during this trip (and not only because I have just finished reading that book). I have done so many things that used to (and still do on some levels) scare me a lot. This past week especially forced me to face several things that terrify me.
First of all, we spent the week in Santa Marta, a small community about a 40 minute chiva (a pick up truck with benches in the back) ride away from Cope. When we got there, we were split into groups and assigned to families. I was placed in a house with Audra and Courtney. Audra studied Spanish in high school, but Courtney has only had a semester’s worth of Spanish. I have had five years, but it has been forever since I have had to use it. I was super scared that we were not going to be able to communicate with our family because they didn’t speak any English. The first night was a little awkward, but after that everything went super well. The family we were placed with, a father (Adonio Rodriguez), mother (Marcelina Arrocha), 25 year old daughter (Marcelina Elena Rodriguez) and a grandma (Elena Sanches), were super patient with us. They spoke slowly and waited while the three of us tried to formulate coherent Spanish sentences.
The first full day we were there, we hiked up to see the remnants of Omar Torrijos’s plane. It was a super intense hike. I wasn’t sure I was going to make it all the way to the top. But I did. It was not worth it. The hike back down was pretty awesome. Plus while I was at the top, my family gave Audra, Courtney and I tea! I finally got to have tea on top of a mountain. There were no Bedouins, but I was still excited.
The next day was the roughest day I have had here in Panama. I felt incredibly useless. I spent the morning volunteering at the school, but I was put into a classroom full of 26 fifth graders with no teacher, no lesson plan and no Spanish… I lost their attention pretty quickly, but I was amazed with how well behaved the kids were. They weren’t paying attention to me, but they stayed in their desks and talked quietly among themselves. There is no way that would happen in the States. After that, I walked with Joey up to meet another group of students who was doing work at the community’s water source. I was expecting a short 5 minute walk, but after 45 minutes of hiking up hill (the day after I climbed a mountain), I hit my breaking point. I was exhausted and tired of walking. Joey and I decided to wait for the rest of the group to go back, but apparently they went a different way so we ended up waiting for much longer than we needed to. That afternoon, we played soccer against the kids. I didn’t play because I was exhausted, physically and emotionally, but it was fun to watch.
The next day was much better. We walked to a couple of waterfalls that are close to the community. I only walked to the first one, because I was still drained from the previous two days of walking. It was really awesome. I swam behind it! That was kind of scary because I don’t swim very often so I am not very good at it. It was another one of those moments where I had to trust people (which I hate doing), but I panicked about half way there and Will had to help me get the rest of the way. I made it though, and it was awesome!
The Santa Marta trip, like the rest of this experience, was both extremely good and extremely terrifying (never really bad… but uncomfortable). I loved spending time with my ‘family,’ but seeing the amount and type of work that they do every day made me feel little bit worthless. I realize more and more on this trip that I can’t really do anything useful. It is a little bit sad, and makes trying to decide what to do with my life extremely difficult. It’s hard to find something to be passionate about if you don’t feel like you can do anything. I’m really excited for my friends because they are getting jobs and going to grad school, but I kind of feel stuck right now. Que Triste…
- Dune by Frank Herbert.
This quote has popped into my head many, many times during this trip (and not only because I have just finished reading that book). I have done so many things that used to (and still do on some levels) scare me a lot. This past week especially forced me to face several things that terrify me.
First of all, we spent the week in Santa Marta, a small community about a 40 minute chiva (a pick up truck with benches in the back) ride away from Cope. When we got there, we were split into groups and assigned to families. I was placed in a house with Audra and Courtney. Audra studied Spanish in high school, but Courtney has only had a semester’s worth of Spanish. I have had five years, but it has been forever since I have had to use it. I was super scared that we were not going to be able to communicate with our family because they didn’t speak any English. The first night was a little awkward, but after that everything went super well. The family we were placed with, a father (Adonio Rodriguez), mother (Marcelina Arrocha), 25 year old daughter (Marcelina Elena Rodriguez) and a grandma (Elena Sanches), were super patient with us. They spoke slowly and waited while the three of us tried to formulate coherent Spanish sentences.
The first full day we were there, we hiked up to see the remnants of Omar Torrijos’s plane. It was a super intense hike. I wasn’t sure I was going to make it all the way to the top. But I did. It was not worth it. The hike back down was pretty awesome. Plus while I was at the top, my family gave Audra, Courtney and I tea! I finally got to have tea on top of a mountain. There were no Bedouins, but I was still excited.
The next day was the roughest day I have had here in Panama. I felt incredibly useless. I spent the morning volunteering at the school, but I was put into a classroom full of 26 fifth graders with no teacher, no lesson plan and no Spanish… I lost their attention pretty quickly, but I was amazed with how well behaved the kids were. They weren’t paying attention to me, but they stayed in their desks and talked quietly among themselves. There is no way that would happen in the States. After that, I walked with Joey up to meet another group of students who was doing work at the community’s water source. I was expecting a short 5 minute walk, but after 45 minutes of hiking up hill (the day after I climbed a mountain), I hit my breaking point. I was exhausted and tired of walking. Joey and I decided to wait for the rest of the group to go back, but apparently they went a different way so we ended up waiting for much longer than we needed to. That afternoon, we played soccer against the kids. I didn’t play because I was exhausted, physically and emotionally, but it was fun to watch.
The next day was much better. We walked to a couple of waterfalls that are close to the community. I only walked to the first one, because I was still drained from the previous two days of walking. It was really awesome. I swam behind it! That was kind of scary because I don’t swim very often so I am not very good at it. It was another one of those moments where I had to trust people (which I hate doing), but I panicked about half way there and Will had to help me get the rest of the way. I made it though, and it was awesome!
The Santa Marta trip, like the rest of this experience, was both extremely good and extremely terrifying (never really bad… but uncomfortable). I loved spending time with my ‘family,’ but seeing the amount and type of work that they do every day made me feel little bit worthless. I realize more and more on this trip that I can’t really do anything useful. It is a little bit sad, and makes trying to decide what to do with my life extremely difficult. It’s hard to find something to be passionate about if you don’t feel like you can do anything. I’m really excited for my friends because they are getting jobs and going to grad school, but I kind of feel stuck right now. Que Triste…
Thursday, March 4, 2010
The expression "to write something down" suggests a descent of thought to the fingers whose movements immediately falsify it. ~William Gass
Going into this trip, I realized it would be a liminal phase (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Liminality). I did not realize how much of a liminal phase it would be. I already can't recognize myself as the girl who left Missouri 2 1/2 weeks ago. I have learned (well, am learning) to go with the flow. I don't find it necessary to know exactly what is happening at every moment of every day. I have also begun to know my limitations and accept them. This has meant that I have to trust others to help me when I can't do something, which involves admitting that I can't do everything. It is quite liberating.
Being in this liminal state, completely separated from my normal surroundings (I didn't know any of the people I am living with prior to starting this adventure. I don't know the language very well. I don't have internet or electricity most of the time.) has dramatically decreased my desire to blog. While I want to share my experiences in Panama, I don't think now is the best time to do it. Since those reading this are not in my communitas (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Communitas), I think it would be very difficult to explain what is going on and how it is affecting me.
Per the requirements of the course, I am still going to update this blog occasionally, but I do not think I will reflect on what is going on until after I get back to the states. I am journaling so I do have some record of my trip, but I don't want to share it in this forum. I want to see how it all pans out and then decide the best way to share the information with everyone. I just think these stories will be better in person or with photos and typing them here will cheapen the experience.
Being in this liminal state, completely separated from my normal surroundings (I didn't know any of the people I am living with prior to starting this adventure. I don't know the language very well. I don't have internet or electricity most of the time.) has dramatically decreased my desire to blog. While I want to share my experiences in Panama, I don't think now is the best time to do it. Since those reading this are not in my communitas (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Communitas), I think it would be very difficult to explain what is going on and how it is affecting me.
Per the requirements of the course, I am still going to update this blog occasionally, but I do not think I will reflect on what is going on until after I get back to the states. I am journaling so I do have some record of my trip, but I don't want to share it in this forum. I want to see how it all pans out and then decide the best way to share the information with everyone. I just think these stories will be better in person or with photos and typing them here will cheapen the experience.
Monday, March 1, 2010
A Dios Mio
I am extremely way out of my comfort zone right now. It is unpleasant. Fortuneately, everyone on this trip is very understanding and willing to help out as much as they can to make things more comfortable. It has been a challenge because I don´t like to rely on other people, but I have been working on getting over that.
I am not in control of anything that is happening on this trip, and that is driving me nuts. I have been presented with lots of situations where I can´t change what is going on, and I just have to deal. For example, it has been raining a ton here the past couple of days, which makes everything super muddy. I hate it because everything is dirty, none of my clothes are dry and I am afraid of slipping down the side of the mountain everytime I have to go to the bathroom. But I can´t control the weather so I put up with it.
I am not in control of anything that is happening on this trip, and that is driving me nuts. I have been presented with lots of situations where I can´t change what is going on, and I just have to deal. For example, it has been raining a ton here the past couple of days, which makes everything super muddy. I hate it because everything is dirty, none of my clothes are dry and I am afraid of slipping down the side of the mountain everytime I have to go to the bathroom. But I can´t control the weather so I put up with it.
Monday, February 22, 2010
Panama - I walk a lot here
So the nearest internet access to where I am staying in Panama is a 30 minute walk plus a 40 minute bus ride away. This is annoying because I have not been able to watch LOST, but also awesome because I haven´t been concerned with being on the internet. I just concentrate on enjoying the beauty of God creation around me. I think this blog will end up being like the one in Israel where most of the updates will happen 6 months to a year after the trip is over...
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Um, So I am here...
Panama is absolutely nothing like what I expected. I don't think I can do it justice in a blog post, but I will do my best.
To get to the research station where we are staying, we walk down a 1/4 mile trail. It is pretty rough, especially since I am out of shape (that particular problem shouldn't last too long...). I freaked out a little when I first got there because the station is built on the side of a mountain, and everything was a little steeper than what I imagined. I was also dehydrated and feeling a little light headed so I was convinced I was going to fall down the side of the mountain and be dead forever. But I survived.
Yesterday we toured El Cope, the town close to where we are staying. We walked, and it was long and hot. The weather is comparable to MO in July except with more rain. After touring El Cope, we went up to the park where most people will be working on their research. It is in a cloud forest so it was cloudy and rainy up there. I saw a sloth! I was super-excited because sloths have been my favorite animal since I was in second grade.
Overall, I think this is simultaneously the best and worst experience of my life. Stay tuned for more, though I don't know how soon because I don't know how often I will have internet.
Mucho Amor!
To get to the research station where we are staying, we walk down a 1/4 mile trail. It is pretty rough, especially since I am out of shape (that particular problem shouldn't last too long...). I freaked out a little when I first got there because the station is built on the side of a mountain, and everything was a little steeper than what I imagined. I was also dehydrated and feeling a little light headed so I was convinced I was going to fall down the side of the mountain and be dead forever. But I survived.
Yesterday we toured El Cope, the town close to where we are staying. We walked, and it was long and hot. The weather is comparable to MO in July except with more rain. After touring El Cope, we went up to the park where most people will be working on their research. It is in a cloud forest so it was cloudy and rainy up there. I saw a sloth! I was super-excited because sloths have been my favorite animal since I was in second grade.
Overall, I think this is simultaneously the best and worst experience of my life. Stay tuned for more, though I don't know how soon because I don't know how often I will have internet.
Mucho Amor!
Sunday, February 14, 2010
"And I need a job, so I want to be a paperback writer"
So I have finally hit the point where I am not updating daily. This will continue since it turns out our internet access is a little more limited than we thought. That will be okay though. It will be nice not to rely on technology/communication quite so much.
The past couple of days have been filled with packing and last minute shopping. It is strange trying to decide what I need for the next two months and fitting into one hiking backpack and a carry-on. I may end up taking another bag since I can have two checked bags. I am taking the train to St. Louis Monday night; however, and I am not sure if I want to try to keep track of an extra bag on the train.
The plus side to an extra checked bag is that I could move some of my books out of my carry-on. I have 9 books so far, and there are sooooo many more I want to take. But I don’t have space :(
Here is my book list:
Spanish Verbs
Spanish Grammar
Spanish-English Dictionary
Beak of the Finch
Dune
Ivanhoe
Pride and Prejudice and Zombies
Bible
And my protection against Marc’s liberal ideas…
I wanted to read St. Augustine’s Confessions, but I wasn’t able to find a used copy in Jefferson City. Just as well. It doesn’t seem like I would have space for it. Que Lastima.
The past couple of days have been filled with packing and last minute shopping. It is strange trying to decide what I need for the next two months and fitting into one hiking backpack and a carry-on. I may end up taking another bag since I can have two checked bags. I am taking the train to St. Louis Monday night; however, and I am not sure if I want to try to keep track of an extra bag on the train.
The plus side to an extra checked bag is that I could move some of my books out of my carry-on. I have 9 books so far, and there are sooooo many more I want to take. But I don’t have space :(
Here is my book list:
Spanish Verbs
Spanish Grammar
Spanish-English Dictionary
Beak of the Finch
Dune
Ivanhoe
Pride and Prejudice and Zombies
Bible
And my protection against Marc’s liberal ideas…
I wanted to read St. Augustine’s Confessions, but I wasn’t able to find a used copy in Jefferson City. Just as well. It doesn’t seem like I would have space for it. Que Lastima.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
"No, I am not a zombie"
I love LOST.
Falafel is delicious.
I should be working on my bio test instead of watching the food network.
I had a really profound comment about our JINS discussion today, but I forgot it.
There was one time I was practicing facepainting, and I tried to make Saturn, but it turned into a Poké Ball.
Falafel is delicious.
I should be working on my bio test instead of watching the food network.
I had a really profound comment about our JINS discussion today, but I forgot it.
There was one time I was practicing facepainting, and I tried to make Saturn, but it turned into a Poké Ball.
Monday, February 8, 2010
More ramblings about Christianity...
So I have been thinking about the Galeano book quite a bit recently (with varying degrees of sobriety), and I have been struck by my reaction to that book and another book I read at the same time The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society. Open Veins of Latin America, the book by Galeano, describes the oppression and extortion Latin American countries have had to deal with at the hands of Europe and the United States for the past five hundred years. Hundreds of thousands, if not millions, have died from overwork on sugar, banana and coffee plantations, or in silver, gold or copper mines to satisfy the demands of foreign investors. Galeano recounts example after example in his book of these atrocities, yet as I was reading it, I was put off by the redundancy of his argument. On the other hand, while reading Guernsey, I was upset by the death of a fictional character.
I am upset that I have developed into a person that can be dismissive of massacres, yet cry over the death of someone who never existed. Is this attitude a product of our society or is it human nature in general? Or both? How do I, as someone who claims to be a Christian, a religion that in its perfect form honors the lives of others above one’s own, end up with this attitude?
One way to understand this phenomenon is from the economic theory of supply and demand. As the world’s population increases, the value of each life is going down. It is hard for a large corporation operating a mine/factory to be persuaded to treat its workers humanely when it really is cheaper to work them to death and hire new ones. I don’t know how to fix this mind set, but it needs to be done.
I was also bothered by my reaction between the two books because it showed me just how inconsistent I am. I loathe inconsistency and to see it so blatant in my life is a huge blow to the ego. I was talking with my friend Nate earlier this weekend about how unequal and unfair the world is. There is always some group that will be trampled on by another group. The pragmatist in me loves the fact that the United States is a world power that dominates everyone else. If someone’s going to be in control, I want it to be me. I want the security of knowing there are resources set aside for me to continue with at least my current standard of living.
That, however, goes completely against the fundamental teaching of my religion/faith (whatever you want to call it). Christianity is based on “Love Jesus; Love others (as Jesus does).” As a Christian, I am called to look outside myself, to be more concerned with the needs of others than I am with my own. If someone’s going to be in control, let it be the other person. I am called to make sure others’ needs are met prior to being concerned about my own. Damn that’s hard. Slash impossible.
I am pretty sure that the majority of the angst in my life is created by the tension between the desire for security, and my desire to live according to the Faith I claim.
But I guess that is what forgiveness is for, eh. Deal with the tension as best you can. Let God take care of the rest.
I am upset that I have developed into a person that can be dismissive of massacres, yet cry over the death of someone who never existed. Is this attitude a product of our society or is it human nature in general? Or both? How do I, as someone who claims to be a Christian, a religion that in its perfect form honors the lives of others above one’s own, end up with this attitude?
One way to understand this phenomenon is from the economic theory of supply and demand. As the world’s population increases, the value of each life is going down. It is hard for a large corporation operating a mine/factory to be persuaded to treat its workers humanely when it really is cheaper to work them to death and hire new ones. I don’t know how to fix this mind set, but it needs to be done.
I was also bothered by my reaction between the two books because it showed me just how inconsistent I am. I loathe inconsistency and to see it so blatant in my life is a huge blow to the ego. I was talking with my friend Nate earlier this weekend about how unequal and unfair the world is. There is always some group that will be trampled on by another group. The pragmatist in me loves the fact that the United States is a world power that dominates everyone else. If someone’s going to be in control, I want it to be me. I want the security of knowing there are resources set aside for me to continue with at least my current standard of living.
That, however, goes completely against the fundamental teaching of my religion/faith (whatever you want to call it). Christianity is based on “Love Jesus; Love others (as Jesus does).” As a Christian, I am called to look outside myself, to be more concerned with the needs of others than I am with my own. If someone’s going to be in control, let it be the other person. I am called to make sure others’ needs are met prior to being concerned about my own. Damn that’s hard. Slash impossible.
I am pretty sure that the majority of the angst in my life is created by the tension between the desire for security, and my desire to live according to the Faith I claim.
But I guess that is what forgiveness is for, eh. Deal with the tension as best you can. Let God take care of the rest.
Saturday, February 6, 2010
Hmmm, so I haven't updated for the past couple of days. They haven't been very productive.
I realized exactly how nerdy this group of people going to Panama is Thursday night. I went out to the bars with a couple of my friends and ran into Dan, Stacy and Joey at Wrongdaddy's. There we were, in a bar, dancing in a crowd of drunk, white people and what was our topic of conversation? Oh, yes. That's right. Eduardo Galeano's book that we read for class. Marc, I hope you appreciate how dedicated we are to your class.
Going out Thursday night resulted in an extremely unproductive Friday. I did get my application for History Departmental Honors turned in, went to a Bio Seminary as a requirement for Bio 100 (I only understood about 10% of what the guy was saying...) and practiced packing, but I didn't get started on any of my reading/writing homework. Packing is difficult because I am trying to fit everything into one bag, and it is just not quite fitting. I need to find out how far we have to carry our things because I may have to give up and take another bag.
I realized exactly how nerdy this group of people going to Panama is Thursday night. I went out to the bars with a couple of my friends and ran into Dan, Stacy and Joey at Wrongdaddy's. There we were, in a bar, dancing in a crowd of drunk, white people and what was our topic of conversation? Oh, yes. That's right. Eduardo Galeano's book that we read for class. Marc, I hope you appreciate how dedicated we are to your class.
Going out Thursday night resulted in an extremely unproductive Friday. I did get my application for History Departmental Honors turned in, went to a Bio Seminary as a requirement for Bio 100 (I only understood about 10% of what the guy was saying...) and practiced packing, but I didn't get started on any of my reading/writing homework. Packing is difficult because I am trying to fit everything into one bag, and it is just not quite fitting. I need to find out how far we have to carry our things because I may have to give up and take another bag.
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Destiny, Destiny, No escaping that for me.
So being my normal, overachieving self, I decided I needed another blog post today to make up for not writing one yesterday. I wasn’t really feeling up to writing about today earlier because it hasn’t been super-great, but I just got back from eating dinner with the lovely Sarah Bell who helped me realize the funny side of today.
I lived in Campbell last semester, and since I am a history major, most of my classes were in McClain and Baldwin. Those two buildings are on the other side of campus, for those who are unfamiliar with Truman. Truman is not a large school, but I still allowed about 15 minutes to walk to class and get a good seat. This semester, I have moved to the Lutheran House, which is closer to campus than Campbell Apartments. My classes are now in Magruder and Violette Hall which are only about a 5-6 minute walk away from my house. Since I haven’t gotten used to having a shorter walk, I have continually arrived way too early for my classes this semester. This morning, however, I decided that was not going to happen. I was going to be intentionally late for class. (This is big for me. I used to have nightmares about being late for class.) I waited until 8:55 to leave for Magruder. I walked slowly across the street and along the side walks. I checked my watch as I walked by Violette Hall, and it said 8:59. The overachiever in me started to get very anxious at that point because I knew I wasn’t going to be on time (I was still about 2 minutes away from the classroom and class starts at 9). I was worried that perhaps I had just picked the wrong day to be late; Chad would be in a bad mood for some reason and get mad at me. I walked more quickly as I got into Magruder. I turned to walk down the hall and as I got closer to room 2078, I noticed the lights were off. “Oh my gosh,” I thought, “I am later than I thought, and they started without me.” I came up to the doorway of the classroom, feeling anxious about being late, but also a little proud for finally being the last student to show up to a class. I walked in to find…
Chad standing by the computer in an otherwise empty classroom. I really shouldn’t try to fight destiny. I will always be early.
And that was just the beginning. Today was probably the worst day I have had in Biology. It was so hard to stay motivated. First of all, I didn’t have a chance to eat breakfast in my mad dash to be late for class so I was quite hungry during class today. Our lecture topic: food webs.
Also, Kudos to you if you can name the movie my title came from.
I lived in Campbell last semester, and since I am a history major, most of my classes were in McClain and Baldwin. Those two buildings are on the other side of campus, for those who are unfamiliar with Truman. Truman is not a large school, but I still allowed about 15 minutes to walk to class and get a good seat. This semester, I have moved to the Lutheran House, which is closer to campus than Campbell Apartments. My classes are now in Magruder and Violette Hall which are only about a 5-6 minute walk away from my house. Since I haven’t gotten used to having a shorter walk, I have continually arrived way too early for my classes this semester. This morning, however, I decided that was not going to happen. I was going to be intentionally late for class. (This is big for me. I used to have nightmares about being late for class.) I waited until 8:55 to leave for Magruder. I walked slowly across the street and along the side walks. I checked my watch as I walked by Violette Hall, and it said 8:59. The overachiever in me started to get very anxious at that point because I knew I wasn’t going to be on time (I was still about 2 minutes away from the classroom and class starts at 9). I was worried that perhaps I had just picked the wrong day to be late; Chad would be in a bad mood for some reason and get mad at me. I walked more quickly as I got into Magruder. I turned to walk down the hall and as I got closer to room 2078, I noticed the lights were off. “Oh my gosh,” I thought, “I am later than I thought, and they started without me.” I came up to the doorway of the classroom, feeling anxious about being late, but also a little proud for finally being the last student to show up to a class. I walked in to find…
Chad standing by the computer in an otherwise empty classroom. I really shouldn’t try to fight destiny. I will always be early.
And that was just the beginning. Today was probably the worst day I have had in Biology. It was so hard to stay motivated. First of all, I didn’t have a chance to eat breakfast in my mad dash to be late for class so I was quite hungry during class today. Our lecture topic: food webs.
Also, Kudos to you if you can name the movie my title came from.
Sorry to anyone who might read this everyday. I missed updating yesterday because it was busy. So, this will just have to be a really long post...
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Wednesday morning was quite productive. I am getting super hyped up about this trip, which has made it difficult for me to sleep recently. So I woke up at 5:45 yesterday. There was a small bright side to this because I was able to finish writing most of my paper by 8:30 that morning.
We didn't do too much in class that day; everyone described how their project was coming along. Blah, blah, blah: the projects are interesting. This post is not. Let me shift gears.
I got my hair cut yesterday! I was able to donate 8 inches to whatever place they send hair off to (I think it was Pantene. Locks of Love only takes 10 inches or longer). I was a little sad to get it cut since I have been growing it out for 3 years, but it will be easier to manage while I am in Panama.
Other fun stuff, my birthday party is this weekend. We're going roller skating at Leisure World. 4:30-6:30. It's $4. You are welcome to come. Tell your friends.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Wednesday morning was quite productive. I am getting super hyped up about this trip, which has made it difficult for me to sleep recently. So I woke up at 5:45 yesterday. There was a small bright side to this because I was able to finish writing most of my paper by 8:30 that morning.
We didn't do too much in class that day; everyone described how their project was coming along. Blah, blah, blah: the projects are interesting. This post is not. Let me shift gears.
I got my hair cut yesterday! I was able to donate 8 inches to whatever place they send hair off to (I think it was Pantene. Locks of Love only takes 10 inches or longer). I was a little sad to get it cut since I have been growing it out for 3 years, but it will be easier to manage while I am in Panama.
Other fun stuff, my birthday party is this weekend. We're going roller skating at Leisure World. 4:30-6:30. It's $4. You are welcome to come. Tell your friends.
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